यूँ ही...!

इधर कुछ दिनों से...
सब एक अर्जी दे जाते है...
कहते हैं सब मुझसे...
यह बदले मिजाज़ तेरे...
कुछ ख़ास समझ नहीं आते है...!

इन शिकायत-ए-रश्क को देखूं...
तो मै भी सोचूँ...
यूँ अचानक हुआ क्या...
जो मुझको नज़र भी नहीं आता है...
बस कुछ है जो, होता जाता है...
घटता जाता है...!

एक नज़र को जब देखा आइना...
रोक कर पूछा मुझसे...
ऐसे तो तुमने पहले कभी न देखा ...
जो न मिला जवाब कुछ मुझसे...
तो पूछ ही बैठा...
कहीं किसी को ढूँढ़ते तो नहीं...?
बोला मैंने, हंस कर, नहीं...!
देखा तो वो भी हंस ही रहा था...!!

एक शाम...
शब् ने संकोच छोड़,मुझसे पूछा...
यह शब्-ए-गम, कहीं मुझसे तो नहीं...?
मैंने बोला, तुम तो पहले भी थी...
और आगे भी रहोगी, फिर..?
शब् ने कहा, हैरान हूँ मैं इस पर...
की यह आता तो मेरे साथ है...
पर न जाने जाता कब है...?

इससे पहले की कुछ कहता...
तारों ने झांकना शुरू कर दिया...
बादलों की ओट से छुप कर बोले...
पहले तो न ढूँढा करते थे, यूँ शिद्दत से...
अब क्या बात है जो हमे गिनते हो...
कहा मैंने कुछ सोच कर...
जिन्हें देखा...
क्या पता वो आज हो, न हो...
यह दिखने ओर होने का फ़र्क समझ...
वोह सारे भी हंस ही पड़े....!

Dance, Shall We.

The party was surely on. Some with clearer objectives / motives, were through with their dinner, while some had preferred drinks. The set up was a traditional small town one. A spacious banquet hall was the venue for the occasion. The music was in place. The gentry was turned out at its best. And what everyone was waiting for, The Dance, was on.

Some were flaunting their latest moves, some were pretty happy with their traditional but limited maneuvers. Everyone was alight. The venue was populated with smart boys and beautiful girls. The smartness and beauty, were enhanced or may be augmented, for sure.

It often happens, during a dance stunt, the Circle-Concept. Sooner or later you, in the midst of your own dance, will find yourself a part of the circle. Its like a monster, it grows and it won't be satisfied until it ropes in everyone, every single one on the floor. Now, if you resist, you will be re-approached until you submit to it.

So as it was, the dance was on, in circles, of course. The flashes of some antique-performers was up an bright. I, as expected, was right at the edge of the monster circle, and she was right at the center, for obvious reasons. It was like epi-center thing. And if everyone's eye and to what it was seeing, were joined to be a straight line. All such lines were to be converging at Her.

So, there was a time, my line converged at the epi-center as well. And she, then, faced me, raised her fist to her face, took out out the index finger and beckoned me. Offensive it was, that's the first thing came to mind and so I stared, conveying how I felt. And she, then smiled unapologetically. I, then started my walk towards her, making my way through the crowded circle. And as I stood in front of her, yet again, she smiled, and said, "So, you know how to dance". I said, "Well, lets see". Contrary to the mood and probably to her expectation as well, I just held her palm and placed the other one on her waist. I precisely don't know how long it lasted, but as it ended...the music was still loud, but everyone was almost still, the circle too was in place, perfectly in shape, and in the center, it was just two of us. "Thanks for the dance", I uttered, and made my way back to the edge of the circle.

LN3.

तेरे साथ में,
क्या कहें हम,
बारिश से हो गए हैं,

की जब होती है...
तो बस वही होती है...
गर जो नहीं होती है...
तो भी एक आस होती है...!

तुम्हे ढूंढे,
की खुद को ढूंढे,
आलम ये है अब,
की आईने में भी,
तुझसे ही गुफ्तगू होती है...!

Every Night.

Every night...
Night after night...
Getting sleep, became...
Finding sleep, and then...
Finally buying sleep.......!

Not long ago...
I used to find sleep...
No sooner I thought of it..!

But with time...
It became demanding...
I had to make efforts to find it...!

The first thing...
The very first thing...
That comes to my mind, before sleep...
Is the slideshow of the high-points of the day...
Unless, there is a one, which is too bad to avoid...!

If the flashes are beautiful...
I certainly do not mind reliving them...
With a few minor adjustments in the "time-space" set up...!

These first things...
Are never constant...
They certainly change...
Most certainly, every night...
And there have been occasional...
Guest appearances of tension and anxiety...!

But one thing...
Has never changed...!

The last thing...
The very last thing...
That comes to my mind, before sleep...
After which there is nothing, I can think of...
Its You...!!
Be there..!!

निशब्द..!

तुम संग चलूँ,
पर कुछ न कहूँ,
चलूँ कभी रेत पर,
चलूँ कभी पानी पर,
पर कुछ न कहूँ...!

उकेरें मिल कर,
किनारा, कभी नदी का..
किनारा कभी समंदर का..
मिल कर उकेरें,
तना, किसी पेड़ का..
तन, एक दुसरे का..

लिखे नाम कभी,
कभी रेत पर..
कभी पानी पर..
कभी हवाओं पर..
लिखे हर वोह बात,
जो कभी कही नहीं,
लिखे और पढ़े, मिल कर..
फिर हँसे, खुल कर...!

ले कर चलूँ, तुझे मैं साथ,
पर कुछ न कहूँ.

कुछ न कहूँ तब भी,
जब गुजरूँ उन छोटी, सजी दुकानों से,
रंगों से जड़ी हर दूकान,
सजाती तुझ पर जो मुस्कान,

चलूँ जब उन पग-डंडियों पर,
कुछ न कहूँ तब भी,
जो पूछे कुछ तू इशारों से,
तो बोलूं मैं निगाहों से,
कुछ कहूँ उन नज़रों से..!

चलूँ जो तेरे साथ,
बिन कुछ कहे,
तो तुम समझ जाओगे न....?

Unsaid.

Some are spoken, spoken aloud,
Some are not.....But they are,
They remain..somewhere..latent.

These are not those words,
which come out 'naturally'.
They are like strong gush of water,
forcing away through the glass,
on a dark stormy night.
which flickers, it shivers, like a snake on glass.
It might, just as well speak, but not to be heard.

These words do not comprise of large and categorized
sweeping generalizations and observations ,
but of those little things which push hard,
to get through those split ribs,
with the desire to be expressed.

These words lie buried in fissures of the key hole, when one can't get that thing going,
They come with the smile on one's face when thinking of an ugly, coarse thought,
They are found on the little scribblings, in class, during a lecture,
They are found in those sigh of reliefs, when reached office on time,
They are the same when one doesn't reaches office on time,
They are ones's company in snarling traffic,

They are the words, at times,
When all one wants to say is those words,
And all you say, is but them,
They live through you,
But die on our lips,
They are those silent explosions,
They surface when one blinks and winks,
They are those unpleasant curses,
They are those silent prayers,
They are the moments of grief,
They are the bright flashes,
They are the dark skies.

They are just those little things,
They ensure that there is light in our own skies.

Yes Please...!!

Yes, is important.
For us and for our lives.

On first thoughts,
One could imagine, that one's life, is pretty much determined by the Yes'es one has earned, and for all practical purposes, Yes'es are more celebrated and cherished.

So, with this pretext, when I look back, in life, and the farthest I could see, is I pleading my mother to buy me the "police-like-dress", which if bought, would have defied the very logic of buying dresses, notwithstanding the strength of my desire to posses it.Of course, it was a No, and an emphatic one !

Next, was my proposition of buying me a bicycle, supposedly, to commute to school, but the geographical proximity of my home to the school, facilitated another heart-breaking No.

And, yes, all these No's were adequately substantiated with logic and reason.

And today, I can't help but attribute it all to my current thought process and general reasoning, thankfully.

Seemingly, the whole journey has been fraught with No's, may be that would explain the celebration of Yes'es.

:- There were No's for Dairymilks, Parley-G's, Cornetto's, GIGO's, Mario, Super- Commando Dhruv's and Nagraaj's, the He-Man, Ducktails, Uncle Scrooz, and even Shaktimaan wasn't spared. I have also had No's for movies, cricket, (playing or watching).

:-Then there were weird No's to visit the roof or even the balcony, I sure could never reason them out.

Its funny, there was a time, when I knew, I had a 'No' coming up, but I, still... would not hesitate in exercising my right to express...:)

:-Then there was a crystal clear No' for the "The Guitar". ( I was in my teen when DDLJ happened.)
:-A similar No, for a bike. ( I wasn't too old when DHOOM happened.)

:-Spoken No's for friends and birthday parties.
:-Unspoken No's, when I used to hover around the central table in the "drawing-room" and guests being served all kinds of delicacies.

:-I have had loud No's, standing beside an asleep friend, with a bucket of water.
:-The quiet No's were many in number, post exams..!!, short lived, though.
:-Well mannered and diplomatic No's after interviews.
:-The "self-served" No's, courtesy, one's principles, morals or fears, may be..!

They were always around.
They are the milestones, they are the grooves, which probably shape one's life,
and on them depends the final hue.

Today as I look back, I can't imagine myself without them.
I am, in hundred gathered sense of the word, grateful to them.

No, Thank you...!!

Come February

It's February.

Rather than celebrating love, courtesy my ineligibility, I intend to use this month to wing different pigeons of love on to their flights of fantasy.

It’s interesting to notice that love as a verb has so many different meaning and dimensions, as in one could love one's parents, or a view , or a movie or may be some stuff: but as a noun, it has just one meaning and only one dimension....you got it.

Most of us are love struck, may be genetically.

We tend to, or may be insist to view things through the colored and thin film of love, and many a times we zoom a little too much and adjust the lens so much that we often miss the mark.

Be it concoction of situation or circumstance, the attire, even the probable (read proposed) conduct and conversation is also not spared....everything is like documented...but by natures law....most things which happen in life are not planned.

It originally begins when the silence before the sleep descends, the lights go dim, eyes are closed but one can see everything clear, all these variants working together in tandem, co-ordinate to paint the most divine picture. This is the point in time when one actually cajoles a name, just a name, into a fully fledged epic. It is noteworthy how, with each carefully woven stitch the whole design is crafted with the most vibrant hues and strokes the night is slumbered away.

And then you carry the delicate crystal, all in your eyes, and in your walk is the purpose, wanting it to happen, it’s all well only till one gets into the designed set up, and then it all falls apart, and one can’t even collect the pieces. Honestly it’s not that painful as much it appears, not because it doesn’t hurt, but simply because one gets used to it……one does it so many times…..over and over….!

Read Slow.....to enjoy.

They are soft, they have the curves and they are very smooth.

To begin with they are a bit hard and reluctant but within a short span of time and some treatment , one can sure tame them. All they need is a little warm up, and there they are at your service...all yours...!

Be it any time of the day, if there is something you can think of at any hour and every hour...its just them. May be we have taken them for granted.They have been around for a while now, and they are always there for us. And the best part is .... it doesn't take too much time. Its doesn't take long with them and in a short while you are done with them.

Come to think of it, there are times, majorly post sunset, when you wished so much for them, if only if they weren't around then. Here comes another winner, they are actually not so hard to manage. And they are a big hit among younger people and are often enjoyed in groups. Although, oldies too would hate to give them a miss, simply because they are so convenient.

I, courtesy, my academy days, have an altogether different, emotional and more than important attachment with them. But being a junior or a senior I think I have "managed" them well. If it were not them, I would have missed a lot in my academy life. I could well call them my savior, at times.

Just imagine, you are almost craving for them and there they arrive, all dressed up, glowing, adorned with accessories.....Smoking Hot....yeah...literally....! more than often they are accompanied by a fork and a spoon........yes our very own .......Maggy Noodles.

I guess I am hungry now..............